Steve's Helena
by Bluemoon4Sphinx
Summary: What if Steve hadn't hated Darren? What if he hadn't gone after him in the grave yard? What if Darren wanted to say goodbye? Darren is Steve's Helena. Songfic to 'Helena' By My Chemical Romance Oneshot, ofcorse. It totally screws the plot of the books. Th


Bastet: It's stupid.

Me: I know. ;n;

Bastet: It's repetitive.

Me: I know. ;n;

Bastet: It screws the plot of the books.

Me: I know. ;n;

Bastet: It's the best thing you've ever posted.

Me: I kn- really!

**Disclaimer**: Darren, Steve, Alan, Tommy, and the plot I screwed all belong to Darren O'Shaughnessy. I DON'T OWN THEM.

**Warning**: Steve has a dirty mouth. Nuf' said.

**Darren is Steve's Helena**

_Steve's POV_.

I'm going home now, and it's getting dark. I don't really care, though. I was over at Alan's today. He was trying to comfort me, ( and he really was trying), but every time He tried to say Darren's name, he burst into tears, So it didn't go very well. Actually, I was doing most of the comforting. Tommy would have been there, but apparently, he's locked himself in his room, and he won't come out. His mom isn't making any motion to try to get him out, anyways. Darren's supposed "death" hit him hard. I don't care what they say. It hit me hardest.

**Long ago  
Just like the hearse you die to get in again  
We are...  
So far from you  
**

It's been a many hours since Darren's funeral. I miss him a lot, but take comfort in knowing one thing: Darren's alive. I know what he did. I know why he did it. I know he's not coming back. He's gone away, and I know that! Yet, I still can't get him out of my mind.

I'm not angry with him. I am kind of… jealous, though. That should have been me, and for two good reasons. One, I've been waiting all my life for something like this; why should Darren get it? The second: The road through vampirism would have been slot less hard on me. I don't have much of a family. My life sucks, royally, and Darren was my one true friend. Sure, I associated myself with Alan and Tommy, but they only hung out with me because Darren was there. I had no real reason to stay around. Except Darren. Now Darren's gone, and my life sucks worse.

**Burning on, just like the match you strike to incinerate...  
The lives  
Of everyone you knew  
And what's the worst you take? **

**From every heart you break  
And like a blade you stain  
Well, I've been holding on tonight**

Now Darren: He had _real_ friends. _Real_ family, and so many people who cared about him. Now their life sucks, and my life sucks, and his life is going to suck. I actually kind of feel bad for him. Oh well. I feel _worse_ for us. Darren, do you even realize the damned sadness you've put to us! …Man, dude, you _suck_.  
**  
What's the worst thing I could say?  
Things are better if I stay  
So long and goodnight  
So long and goodnight**

Well, he doesn't really suck all that bad. I mean, he gave his flipping humanity for me! You got to give him some credit for that. I don't really hate him. It's just jealousy. Yeah. Just that. I really cared for him; he was like a brother to me. No, more than a bother! I mean, I've known him the longest, and I know the most about him!... It's times like this that I wonder who I'm talking to. I am trying to tell myself he's gone…1..2…3 times… blast! IT'S _NOT_ WORKING!

**Came a time  
When every star fall brought you to tears again  
We are…  
The very hurt you sold  
And what's the worst you take?  
From every heart you break **

**And like a blade you stain  
Well, I've been holding on tonight**

Yes, it's not Darren I hate. It's his stupid mentor. Vur Horston, or Larten Crepsley, as the case may be. It's his entire fault. Him, and that stupid spider. If Darren hadn't saw him call me evil (WHICH I'M NOT!), Darren wouldn't have been scared of me. If that spider hadn't bit me, Darren wouldn't have had to give up his humanity for the antidote(yes, I know about THAT too), making him, me, and everyone else that knew him miserable. … Ok, so all this is kind of my fault. So what? It's not ALL my fault! It was mostly that stupid vampire's.

What's the worst that I could say?  
Things are better if I stay  
So long and goodnight  
So long and goodnight

Not Darren's, though. Darren was just an innocent bystander to the whole thing. So I can't really say anything bad about him. He was only trying to help me. Thanks, Darren. You ruined my life. I'd rather you have let me die than to have teamed up with that bastard. So can't you at least get out of my head!...What am I doing? You can't even hear me. I think I might be going insane. Hm, not that it matters; I was already half crazy anyways.

Well if you carry on this way  
Things are better if I stay

**So long and goodnight  
So long and goodnight **

I guess I just… miss him…and envy him. …Man, I talk to myself way too much. I guess…I wish I could have said goodbye. I …just miss him…and-what the hell! Is that a car?...!

Can you hear me?  
Are you near me?  
Do we deserve to leave the earth?  
Do we Meet again?  
When both our cars collide

I feel like a deer in the headlights. Well, actually, I _am_ a deer in the headlights. It's as if my feet are glued to the pavement. I can't move, I can't run. I'm going to die. I close my eyes, awaiting impact… and am surprised to feel it come from my side. Not only that, but it doesn't hurt. It's like I'm flying… out of the way, out of the danger… then I hit ground. Hard. I groan, and sit up slowly. I open my eyes and examine myself, only to find that the only thing wrong with me is a sore ass. What the hell?...

**What's the worst thing I could say?  
Things are better if I stay  
So long and goodnight  
So long and goodnight **

I look up and see someone I never thought I'd see again. I see a Teary-eyed, brown haired pre-teen leaning over me, concern etched into his features. I see my previously "dead" best friend. "Darren!"

Well if you carry on this way  
Things are better if I stay  
So long and goodnight  
So long and goodnight

He gives me a small, sad smile, and a tear rolls down his cheek.

I blink, and he's gone.

… Damn it. Now I miss him again.

* * *

Aw. Anguish-y Steve. 


End file.
